Why is it so hard to let go of anger and hurt? I’ve never met anyone who said they enjoy spending hours crying and in pain. It’s not much fun either to waste energy being mad at someone. Yet you see people all the time thrashing someone or posting some depressing song quote online. I’m not saying don’t show any emotion but people tend to let these feelings consume them.
The easiest example is the ending of a relationship. It’s rare for a relationship to end equally amicably, there always seems to be one person who comes out hurt. You spend time, energy, and emotions in a relationship that ends. Naturally, you aren’t going to be smiling and undamaged when it ends. Most research says that it takes an average of half the time your relationship lasted for you to get over the breakup. You may get over the breakup but what about the emotional baggage? If your relationship ended because of cheating or lying, that could lead to a mistrust in your next relationship. Not only mistrust, but a rage can build inside yourself “how dare they/how could they” these thoughts can slowly drive one a bit insane. We all know someone who might of gone a bit crazy; maybe keyed their ex’s car, trash an ex’s stuff, or even tried to drink their pain away.
Some people grow up in an environment that is healthy. Not every adult is meant to raise another human being, nonetheless it happens. You have parents who verbally and physically attack their children. Resentments is something that happens quite often in this situation. These kids grow up, and as soon as they can they leave this environment they pack up their bags. They have gone through so much, they hold anger and resentment towards their parents. Sometimes society seems to treat you like a second class citizen, either you aren’t the right size, color, gender, orientation, or whatever else doesn’t fit the “norm”. People call you names, and can even make you second guess, maybe they are right. You can grow up believing what they say, and even make you change yourself to try and fit in. You can grow to feel resentments towards yourself.
Life loves to test us. Going through life you are bound to get beaten a bit, and it can leave scarring. Where we can go wrong is when we let these things control and shape our lives. When it comes to relationships, we need to remember that not every person after your ex is the same. Don’t carry the negativity to something that should start off positive. When you project and allow negativity to come into your life, you are allowing these people to hold you back. Growing up in a hostile home, can make it very hard to forgive your parents once you move on. Sometimes our parents do the best they can, and they still fail. At the end of the day they are still the reason you are here, don’t let their mistakes or inadequacy keep them from being your parents. Then you have people in society who love to attack those different than themselves. These people are just ignorant and scared. When someone tries using a derogatory word on you, just brush it off. They don’t know what they are saying, but you do know who you are.
Don’t allow anyone to bring you down in life. Don’t allow negativity that comes from people affect you and infect your life. One of the best feelings is forgiving those who have given you scars. Don’t carry anger, resentment, and hurt longer than you need to. Life is a long journey, lets not carry anything extra that we don’t need to.