Meeting People Online


Those of you in a relationship, I freaking hate you. Not because you have a special someone but because you don’t have to deal with the a**holes and weirdos out in the world anymore. I now understand why two people that shouldn’t be together refuse to dump each other, they know what’s out there in the dating world and it’s a beast.

I’ve touched on this before and I probably said something about “don’t give up and be happy with oneself blah blah blah”. Let’s just face it, most of us want someone. There’s a few who really are happy just being alone and having sex with a different person every night (is it just me or does that sound exhausting? no thanks), but that’s not me. I just want to have someone that I can cuddle with at night, talk about my day as I cook, and someone I can count on to be there for me. I honestly don’t think that’s too much to ask for. Yet from the look of my experience online it seems to not exist.

After being stranded on the ocean that is the online site I was on, I finally connected with this guy (we shall call him Nemo). After a few days of back and forth we exchanged phone numbers. Nemo seemed like a catch; we had fluid conversations, hadn’t brought up sex, and seemed like a nice enough guy. Then slowly but surely our communications began to become more and more sparse. I don’t like when someone seem needy and keep texting you after you haven’t responded, but now I get it. Nemo hadn’t responded and I wanted to send another text, you know just in case he didn’t get my last hundred texts (I didn’t really send a hundred, more like fifty), yet I withheld on the hundred-and-one text and chalked it up to a loss. It’s rare for me to connect with someone so I haven’t experienced this too much but I’ve read countless stories of this happening. Why? Don’t drag someone along, and flirt back if you have no intentions. Just be honest and say you aren’t feeling it, sorry!

Now let’s be honest here, this is a site of honesty, they are times when you just want sex. We’ve all been there, luckily for us gays we have a plethora of apps and sites to solve this problem. Yet this too has now become a delicate dance, that is more exhausting than the sex itself. Most sites have the basic information that you need to decide if this is someone you can have sex with, yet it seems to not help in easing the process. Guys start asking for more pictures, and more information. You either want to have sex with me or you don’t, cut the crap and get to business (this makes me sound like a slut I know). By the time you find someone, you are exhausted.

My biggest pet peeve on these sites is when people don’t read your profile. They see someone mildly attractive, and they just send a message with sexual content (I’m assuming when they see my picture and message me they are drunk). My profile specifically says under “looking for” that I want dates and friends, no where on there do I mention one night stands, three-ways, toe-sucking, or orgies. Yet over eighty percent of my messages come down to sexual activities. Either they don’t read my profile or just don’t care. I mean i find these messages entertaining, but at times it just makes the whole attempting to online date seem negative and a waste of time.

I’ve gone on a couple of dates (if they are even considered that) from people I’ve met online, which makes me depressed. The amount of time and energy spent online, for very small returns. All one can do is keep going, and hope that the special someone is right around the next foot-fetish person.

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10 thoughts on “Meeting People Online

  1. Exactlyyyy! I’m just a homoaffective asexual but my friend suggested to me to use Grindr. The first thought that comes to my mind is “That’s a hookup app, not a dating app.”. Understandable though, most men only love with their duck (typo intended)…

    *Sigh* If only there is a proper dating app.

    • I actually did find one real relationship from Grindr, but that may be a fluke occurrence. Just have to deal with the sexually driven people, until we find someone that wants to date. Thanks for reading by the way.

  2. I feel like there’s got to be a balance point though. I don’t know, I’m pretty honest about having a high sex drive but still wanting something more than just a one night stand… I can’t stand the whole wham-bam-thanks-man scene but if I’m flirting with you, it’s gonna get sexual at some point. Idk, sex and our society is a whole big mess that’s always going to vary from person to person, you know?

    • It’s bound to get sexual but it seems most guys bring it up way too soon. Lets have one date Atleast before you try and get me in bed. I have rule when it comes to sex and dating, 3 month wait from first date. Sounds horrible I know.

      Thanks for reading.

  3. In my experience, as much as online dating can completely suck, it’s giving me plenty of dating experiences, and those experiences are giving me the confidence to approach more men out there in the real world. That said, I just met someone who appears to be amazing, online (date 3 is this weekend). And, my friend Joshua met his handsome and successful boyfriend online (5 years ago)… So it does happen! Sorry for being all sunshine, lollipops and rainbows 🙂 Spring is making me equally as optimistic, as I am frisky. Hang in there!

    • Those sunshine stories are a good thing, gives one hope. I met my last serious boyfriend online, so I know it can happen I just want it to happen faster (-:

      Thanks for sharing and reading.

  4. I know exactly how you feel, wading through the hordes of filthy guys, trying to find that one that can actually hold a pleasant, non-sexual conversation AND remain interested in you for more than three days. Just hang in there! There’s other guys like you and I out there; we’ll find one another eventually!

    • “We’ll find one another eventually” is this you making the first move? How cheeky of you, and I accept. (-:

      All I can do is be patient, not my strong suit, but hopefully it’ll be worth it. Thanks for checking my page out.

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