One of my favorite book’s and movie’s is The Perks of Being a Wallflower, the story is able to showcase so many issues we face as we try to understand ourselves and our place in the world. One of my favorite messages in the story has to deal with relationships.
“Why do I, and everyone I love pick people who treat us like we’re nothing?”
“We accept the love we think we deserve.”
What I have come to realize is that in order for a relationship to be successful and lasting we need to have ourselves figured out. How can we share our life with someone else if we don’t understand who we are? When we don’t truly understand ourselves we can sell ourselves short. We can fall into relationships that are not healthy for us.
We don’t value ourselves and all we have to offer, we settle for something that’s not what we deserve. Of course in that moment we don’t think of it as settling, we honestly believe this is what we deserve. We don’t have enough confidence and self value in ourselves to realize that we deserve more than what we are receiving. We can become so submissive in these kinds of relationships, but we stay because this is what we deserve. There could be people around us that tell us we deserve more, but if we don’t realize it ourselves we just can’t see it.
There are areas in a relationship where you may have to settle, but at the end of the day the person loving us back has to do the same. You should never settle for someone who makes you feel like nothing. We all have our faults but that doesn’t mean we don’t deserve something great. The person you are with should accept you and your flaws, and make you feel perfect regardless.
You should only accept love that is sincere and warm hearted. Love that makes you feel like you should be an even better person. Love that doesn’t make you question your self worth. You deserve love that will make you happy.