This may sound weird but I think of the most negative things one can have in life is expectations. Growing up and being the “smart one” so many people would tell me they expected me to do great things. When people expect things from you there’s this automatic fear of not reaching those expectations and being a failure. Not reaching the potential all these people expect you to reach, or maybe even expectations you put upon yourself.
All those expectations that are fed to you can start manipulating decisions you make. You may even start believing these expectations need to come true, even if it’s not what you really want. Sometimes people get so swept up in expectations that they decide to try and reach those expectations. The problem is, you can’t fake your way down a path you don’t believe in. No matter how strong the desire to please these people with expectations for you (family, teachers, friends, strangers), forcing yourself to do something you don’t really want only leads to emptiness.
Sometimes we put expectations on ourselves. The thing is life is chaos and not everything you desire can come to fruition. When you don’t reach those expectations; you assume you are a failure, you didn’t try hard enough, or you just aren’t worth achieving it. No matter how much work you put into it, you aren’t meant to reach those expectations. By no means should this diminish who you are, it’s just one of those things you need to shake off and move on from. You should admire the work and effort you put into it, and not dwell on not reaching the “expectation”.
I’ve seen, and I’ve been one of those myself, so many people work and stress themselves beyond the breaking point for these so called expectations. At the end of the day you need do to what feels good to you, and not expect anything from it. If you pick a path it shouldn’t be to reach the end, it should be to experience that journey. If you start something off already expecting what the end will be, you are setting yourself up for disappointment. All you need to believe in is your potential, and that could take you to unexpected places.
Glad you could join me on this beautiful day to learn the secret to obtaining a happy and a stress free life. So are you ready? Get your pen and notepad out. (Do people even use notepads?)
That’s the secret. Not the words but the meaning they can carry. We grow up with various strings attached to ourselves, they come from family, school, and society. Little strings that control the actions and even decisions we make. The problem is when we are old enough to have a self realized conscious with the ability to think and act for ourselves, yet we don’t detach ourselves from the strings. We may be oblivious to the outside factors controlling us or even afraid to take our life into our own hands.
I wouldn’t stray you down a wrong path, saying F*#! You to those outside forces and taking full control of your life is the most liberating thing you will ever do. There will be fear…fear of the unknown. People who enjoy life the most are the ones who faced the unknown and lost. I said it…lost. The memories that stick most with you are the ones where you fell flat on your face, but got right back up (even if you had a stream of blood coming down your face), not the ones where you walked safely across a street. Trying to live life without any mistakes or fails, is impossible and stressful. You will fail, and more than once. But if you believe in yourself you know that you have the strength to move on and try again or move on to something else.
Not worrying about what others will think or say is refreshing. Afterall, this is your life, no one else’s. For the most part the people around you want you to suceed and be happy, they don’t want you to suffer. They may disagree with something in your life , not to rain on your parade but because they truly think it’s a bad choice. The thing is, if it makes you happy go for it. Don’t let other’s opinions keep you from doing what you want to do. Your friends might be right, and the decision you made will blow up in your face later but if you never took that chance then you would always think “what if”. Just chalk it up as another adventure.
Life is really too short to always play it safe. If it makes you happy in this moment do it. If later on you realize it was a mistake then you will move on and grow from that experience. It really is true that we learn more from making mistakes then being correct. Don’t be afraid to take life into your hands.
Some say that the universe only puts hard things into your life because it knows you can handle it. I truly believe that. If you ever doubt yourself, then know that I know you can do it. That may not be a big boost, but it’s true. Remember to just say F*#! You and go for it.